Helpless?

I've recently moved into one of the coolest neighborhoods in the world. But as I'm getting settled I'm realizing there is a lot of pain in my new hood. Downtown Fort Lauderdale has been going through some heavy change over the last 12 years. If the word gentrification doesn't mean anything to you, your probably not being affected by it, or you've been affected by it and know all to well what it does,but your overworked, underpaid teacher never quite got to that lesson. There is a distinct division between the middle to upper class white people, and the black people in my "community." Right now I'm simply stating the obvious issue, and admitting that I have no clue as to where to begin to seek reconciliation and health, other than through Christ one relationship at a time. I'm not helpless, but at times I feel it. One thing I do know is that I won't receive any advice or thoughts from any of the people that understand gentrification, but can't spell it, via my blog. I'd be delightfully shocked if any of my hurting neighbors even knew about blogging. This private/public world of blogs is an interesting one isn't it.

To the "Church"

We have to encourage each other to seek who we are in Christ. We can't create an atmosphere out of comfort and control that chokes our brothers and sisters. We must develop discipleship. We have to know each other well enough to care. Well enough to love, encourage, admonish, challenge, and see Christ in our relationships. Well enought to know and learn what our roles are in this real, functioning body.

Recent e-mail

Over half of my friends are seriously struggling in their marriages. My heart is heavy, but I'm blessed to be able to journey and mourn with them, looking forward to the joy of health and reconciliation. I'd like to ask you to pray for our families, but the reason I wanted to write is to tell you that I'm really honored to have your friendships. I know often we go our own ways and do our own thing in this individualistic world, but I'm so glad to have you to know, and love, and lean on, and be a leaning post for. It's times like this when I desperately want to gather everyone that I love together, pick a place, I don't even care where that much, and live together. Let's buy a run down old high rise in some city and restore it and all live in it and live well in that city. I would love it if we all had that as our calling. But then again, half of you do live in close proximity and we're not fully taking advantage of it. That's sad! Please help me do a better job of being selfless with my time. That's when I enjoy it the most anyway. Thanks for being amazing brothers and sisters. I love you and will forever be thankful.

Separation, Divorce, and Selfishness

It seems that many of my friends in the last few years have gotten married, as well as myself. I've heard over the last couple years all of the horrifying statistics around divorce, but until recently hadn't connected with them. So much for that! My heart is almost as broken as the American family. Friends left and right, near and far are falling apart. For various reasons, all stemming directly back to selfishness, people I love are hurting and turning to themselves for comfort. Separation, divorce and selfishness walk hand in hand dividing even the "strongest" unities. Today I read on the Barna website that studies show that born again believers are just as likely to divorce as non-believers. Should that be appalling? I know that many went into marriage unwisely, with false expectations or selfish ambition, but why is there so much failure. I am done assuming it's a generational thing. Divorce has been a common issue forever. If we are truly "born again," we must go back to the source of our rebirth and seek strength and guidance. It is not ok. I know why I married Teresa, and when times are difficult I have to run back to the reason. I without a doubt had peace from my Lord about loving Teresa Hardee more than myself and being her husband. That peace has and will give me strength through the years to desire to grow together and not apart. If you are not yet married know that it is not good for a man to be married unless he has heard from the voice of the Great Shepard. If you are married, you made a covenant, love selflessly, and watch God bless your marriage. To my friends that are struggling, I love you deeply, and it hurts me that you're struggling. I will mourn with you, but not give up.

PureRants.com

That's not really a website to my knowledge, but it should be. I was just in the shower when a wave of thought hit me. Five words were given to me two years ago to meditate on. Purity, Passion, Commitment, Love, and Selflessness. Just thought I'd publicly post those for anyone interested, or just myself for future reference. The wave began with the remembrance of those five words. I hadn't thought about them in a year probably, but they still have my attention.
I'm daily frustrated with myself. This morning I drove to work giving the day to my Savior and as soon as I stepped into the fire station I took it back. I relinquished it a few times throughout the day briefly, but for the most part I focused on me. Idolatry is such a stronghold that I forget that it's holding me. If I could simply obey the first two commandments my life would be radically different. It's so difficult to believe that the Creator God loves me and forgives my perpetual sin. I don't feel worthy, rightfully so, to be liked by the Almighty Judge. I'm so sick of sugar coating the truth, and essentially robbing my Lord of his deserved worship for His mercy and grace. He is the loving, perfect, worthy, righteous, jealous, just, judge. He isn't ignorant, he is a consuming fire, he is the *creator of evil, and he is the holy peace maker. If we could "simply" love and obey Christ above all, what would our lives look like. I recently learned a powerful lesson, only to lose sight of it almost immediately. The Shepard spoke to His sheep, and the Holy Spirit gave me ears to hear. You must read John 14, again and again. Christ because of my love and obedience made Himself manifest to me. It was in a simple small way, but it was overwhelmingly powerful. I will praise God for that forever, all the while desiring more. Not for my glory, but His. We must know our Lord to give Him the proper praise, in spirit and truth, and honor that He alone deserves. Stop boating in your name. I have to focus on Gods will and not my own. Live in abundance and satisfaction, not fear and hopelessness. Don't take mans word as Gods. Seek truth, wisdom, and that scary thing that's so necessary, called faith. Trust God, He is faithful, He is good, He is Perfect. Don't be fooled, death is inevitable, and soon for sure. But life is everlasting. I can't wait to be made whole. Five words for now: Purity, Passion, Commitment, Love, and Selflessness.


*KJV
Isaiah 45:5-10
5 I am the LORD, and there is none else, there is no God beside me: I girded thee, though thou hast not known me: 6 That they may know from the rising of the sun, and from the west, that there is none beside me. I am the LORD, and there is none else. 7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.